sajak yang aku penakan ...

Daun2 Yg Berjatuhan.

Suratan tidak pernah keliru

Mentakdirkan hakikat
Segunung suara aku berseru 
Sesepi  dihati ku bertaranum

Dalam tertib tajwid yang diam

Agar diizinkan iradat

aku  kutip dan cantum  semula

(Walau jari jari tua ini telah ketar)

Serpihan-serpihan mahkota yang telah hitam

Dan,sisa kalimat cintamu yang telah kering
berselerakan lantaran bisikan berapi.

Ingin  ku bersihkan

dan  ku baluti

Dengan sutera kilap yang lembut dan  kuyup

Dari Airmata yang  bertasbih menyebut namamu

Ketika terbitnya ia 

Andaikata diizinkan

Aku ingin penjarakan kenangan

Agar tiada lagi menjadi sandaran

Atau testimony sejarah

Untuk detik detik hari esok

Ketika kudratku  luntur
untuk memukul tabuh senja,
tuli untuk menilai jerit sesalanmu...
dan rabun tuk memerhatikan perarakan
burung terbang tak tujuan
melarikan
replika pujukanmu.

Sajak ini ilham.dikarang & ditulis oleh:

Nor Azman Hassan Basri.

Khamis 26.1.2012

Feelin reluctant and uneasy moving from Batu Road Boys School (picture above)  to a secondary school and   wearing those silly dark green long   pants which my dad bought  at Selangor Mansion, Jalan Masjid India.The pants was slightly big for my size , but I had to tolerate the 'defect' as my dad says that I will grow as the months progresses.

 As an adventurous city boy, I proudly use the public transport to go to Maxwell School which was 15km away from home. In 1973, the volume of traffic on the road is of acceptable level and the buses movement are normally on time & predictable.

My Mum is a fast cook and my dishes are simple.ThenI’ll leave my house with lunch up loaded in my stomach at 11am to take either the 11.15am or 11.30am Segambut Dalam bus belonging to Len Omnibus Sdn Bhd to KL with the route plate number 91.

             

There were others  at the bus stop - girls, boys and adults  as I unintentionly  noticed a distinguished young school girl in the crowd , new and alien to us in the kampong, wearing a pair of specs and on her dress the prestigious Convent Bukit Nenas School badge .We exchanged  glances ,and pretended to be passive as the  eyes wondered elsewhere.

When the white and red coloured  Len Omnibus bus arrives,   behaving like officers & gentlemens,  the boys will let the girls  board the bus first and the boys wil usually standup as all the seats will be already taken by the earlier passengers.And during the journey we continue to look at each other eyes until I board off d bus first as her journey to her school is way towards the city centre.

One day on the bus as I walk towards the back seat stil looking at each other, she smile and said ‘hi , I have something for you’,I smiled, my hand out of controlled went forward and  took the envelope she handed & thanked her.

Inside me its was trembling , frozen and speechless and at  the same time so crazy of her.Later  that night, me and my two elder sister was trying to write a letter in respond for her request to befriend me.

The next day , on the bus I gave the letter prepared by my eldest sister.I will remember this occasion til the day I die as this is the first time in my life receiving and giving a letter to an unknown  girl in the name of passion.

Her name Afrida Ahmad a Singaporean from Blair Plains and she’s staying at Hj.Pilus her Grandpa’s home in Segambut and coincident a neighbour to us.She's here to continue her studies instead of doing it in Singapore.


Then this couple still at the cusps of adolescent, so innocent  became infatuated to each other.Or in other words this young couple started a courtship at the aged 12 towards 13 years and were moving to a puppy love zone.Still on the bus, one day she gave me a tie pin .I gave her a ring  (bought by my elder sister from an lady accessories shop) which she wear it for a long time.

From the minute the friendship begins, my life was full of daydreams..fantasies and all my examinations results were major disasters to everybody except myself.Ha..ha...Abah & Mak had a hard time trying to bring  my frame of mind back to reality so that I can focus on my studies.

During school holidays,she will go back to Singapore and for a while I felt I miss her eventhough a chain of receive letters & postcards with  Singapore postal stamps reached myhands.Maybe that was the first time in my life that I miss someone.Recalling the old feeling makes me laugh but its surreal...happened unconsiously. I withdrew from my  friend, turned into a loner to be carried away in the emotions.Hmmm..I remembered the song 'Yesterday When I Was Young" , the lyrics are precisely related to the event  but I did not have sufficient vocabulary to express to her the depth of the longing to see her. .

Now 40 years has already  passed, I still wonder why she choose me to pour her youthful emotions and feelings  at such a young age which I voluntary reciprocated.I collapsed into a world of  wooziness being drunk by  'first love'. While having a soulmate at a young age, I continue to be active like other kampung boys  playing kampung football,konda kundi,hide/seek,climing trees  & war games using senapang kayu with my friends.Apart from that I definitely like to pee at my neighbour's kebun Pokok Ubi.

 

Like a child having gotten a new toy, the puppy love lasted for few months , but Im glad that as we grew older and matured, we end up became friends and she befriended both of my elder sisters and my wife Salwani.As the clock ticks away and time passes, good friends got lost along the way, I wish all the best for her and may Allah bless her....and til now I stil regard her'a friend '.

Prof Khoo Kayu Kim masih menerus 'perjuangan' beliau untuk menafikan kewujudan Hang Tuah dengan mengatakan Hang Tuah hanyalah mitos lantaran tiada rekod dalam log Sejarah Melayu Nusantara yang disimpan di museum London, Portugal dan Belanda.

Seekor lagi penulis blog yang menggunakan nama cina mengatakan nama 'Hang' adalah nama keturunan/keluarga Cina & merumuskan Hang Tuah & 4 lagi sahabat nya adalah berbangsa Cina.Beliau & Prof Kayu Kim dilihat cuba menafikan kehebatan pejuangan Melayu Islam  Nusantara ketika itu dan ingin mengubah sejarah, malah jika tidak disangkal esok lusa mereka akan dakwa Parameswara itu dari berasal dari Beijing.


Pendapat aku sama dengan 'pendatang haram' dari Tiongkok ini (tiada rekod imigresen Atuk Nenek dia masuk ke Tanah Melayu) dan berharap orang Melayu tak marah dengan pandangan yang aku hamparkan seterusnya. Hang Tuah adalah seorang Cina yang buta huruf memandangkan  orang Cina yang sezaman dengan dia seperti Laksamana Cheng Ho berjaya membawa armada kapal laut Cina dari Tiongkok sampai ke India.Tamadun China ketika itu sangat tinggi, lihat saja binaan/rekabentuk kapal perang (ocean going vessels) yang berupaya merentas Lautan China Selatan dan Lautan Hindi.Laksamana Cheng Ho dan Jurumalim2nya menggunakan kalkulasi bagi menjayakan navigasi yang rumit demi hubungan politik & ekonomi antara rantau dizaman itu , Cheng Ho telah merekodkan didalam Buku Log Pelayaran,perkara yang berlaku dan  yang dilakukan setiap masa yang kini  menjadi bukti rujukan dan penyelidikan sejarah hari.Ditengah kehebatan kekuasaan teknologi Angkatan Tentera Negara China ketika itu, wujud 5 insan daif yang hidup   terpinggir (freakies) bernama Hang Too Wah, Hang Jee Bak, Hang Lee Kiu , Hang Lee Kee dan  Kah Tuu Wee .Sudah pasti Laksamana Cheng Ho tidak menulis kwujudan 5 insan kerdil ini yang hanya setaraf dengan budak suruhan cuci kakilima diluar dinding istana Maharaja China.

Rakyat China biasa berperang akibat konflik dalaman atau konflik antara wilayahnya.Terdapat banyak kitab ketenteraan, persenjataan dan strategi peperangan yang ditulis dan dipelajari oleh perajurit China ketika itu.Persiapan perang adalah wajib dan menjadi norma dan budaya mereka sehingga hari ini.Dizaman dulu setiap perajurit sejati  China akan dilatih serta dididik dengan kaedah Shaolin Kungfu dan teknik Tempor guna Pedang & senjata kecil seumpama Ninja Jepun.Menyerang dgn menunggang kuda serta kemahiran memanah dipelbagai tahap dari peringkat basic hingga peringkat 'specialize'.

Bagaimana pun Hang Too Wah dan rakan2nya bukan saja buta huruf tapi bebal kerana tidak boleh memahami kurikulum Shaolin, lantas  telah melarikan diri kesebuah dusun durian dikaki Gunung Ledang untuk belajar silat pulut.Antara perancangan mereka ialah mencari rezeki dengan mempamirkan Silat Pulut dimajlis perkahwinan  dan sementara dalam proses menuntut ilmu dari tuan punya dusun tersebut, mereka boleh  makan durian free ketika musim.

Silat Melayu digunakan untuk

                                           bergaduh diwarung tomyam , pasar kecil  , belakang kedai baiki motosikal  dan ketika berebut durian yg gugur dr pohon.The duel is normaly  last for few minutes cause a lot of  'pause' due to the call for prayers ( azan disurau.).After prayers, the  temper dies down and off they go home.Foto diatas adalah latihan intensif  teknik 'Buah Tahan Kentut'.

Perajurit China telah biasa dengan

                                      peperangan skala besar , perlatan perang yang banyak dan mampu berperang untuk tempoh masa yang  lama ditempat sukar seperti kawasan pergunungan dan padang pasir.Foto diatas adalah Pengurus/Pentadbir Pertempuran memberi arahan.

Dizaman dahulu setiap perajurit China yang menyertai bala tentera Angkatan Perang akan dibekalkan dengan Pedang, Baju Besi,kasut & Topi serta bendera/panji2 batalion dan ilmu peperangan.Tapi Hang Too Wah tak larat nak angkat pedang yg panjang..kurang stamina kerana menu hariannya pulut dan durian  .Maka dengan idea bodoh 5 sekawan itu, mereka cipta pedang pendek serta ringan.Bgmanapun oleh sebab mereka buta seni,pedang pendek yang dibuat bengkang bengkuk , 5 insan bodoh ni duduk merenung pedang pendek yang bengkok2 tu kerana buntu & kehabisan idea utk meluruskannya .Ketika itu lalu seorang penjual Nasi Dagang keturunani Kelantan dan bertanya, 'kelih ghapo tu weh?'.Terkejut, Hang Lee Kiu jawap 'kelih ambo!'

Dari Istilah 'kelih' itulah asal  perkataan ''keris' berdasarkan fakta orang Cina agak sukar untuk sebut huruf 'R'. 

Kealpaan 5 samseng inilah punca Kota Melaka berjaya diserbu masuk oleh tentera Portugis.Berdasarkan Hikayat Hang Tuah Dewan Bahasa Putalam, individu yang membuka pintu masuk utama  Kota tersebut adalah Tun Mutahir yang belot pd pentadbiran Melaka ketika itu.Tun Mutahir tahu segala strategi Hang Too Wah dan Tentera Melaka yang terdiri dari perbagai keturunan iaitu minangkabau, bugis ,jawa, india .Rahasia tersebut bocor  kerana  orang Cina suka bercakap kuat ketika makan malahan ketika mengintip pun cakap kuat sampai satu kampung yang dengar.

Tun Mutahir adalah seorang keturunan Mamak yang menjalankan business part time Restoran Nasi Kandar dekat pelabuhan Melaka.Berdasarkan sejarah ramai pedagang India dan Kapal2 dari India telah singgah membawa rempah ratus yang bermutu tinggi.Oleh yang demikian, Tun Mutahir telah menyalah gunakan jawatannya sebagai Pegawai Tinggi kerajaan Melaka dengan mengambil bekalan rempah secara paksa/percuma.Kehebatan masakan restorannya telah menjadi tumpuan ramai dan menjadikan restoren itu tu 'port' bagi penduduk sekitar. Dan kebetulan, Hang Too Wah sering pi makan , berjudi dan berhutang disitu.Direstoren itulah semua perancangan tentera Melaka didengari dan diketahui oleh Tun Mutahir dan kemudian memyampaikan nya kepada armada Portugis yg berlabuh diluar Pelabuhan Melaka ketika itu.

Akhir sekali saya setuju  Hang Too Wah ini seorang Cina.Bagaimanapun saya takrifkanya seorang yang  PEMALAS dan tiada visi jika dibandingkan dengan budaya Cina yang diketahui umum iaitu satu kaum yang  'very industrious dan business minded' dari dulu dan selamanya. Sepatutnya Hang Too Wah ini buat business jual alat peledak, meriam, canonball, kapal perang, pedang dan baju besi kepada kerajaan Melaka sebelum diserang oleh Portugis.Tetapi dia tidak buat demikian mungkin kerana sibuk meramal nombor ekor.

Sesiapa saja yang mendakwa Hang Too Wah  keturunan Cina, saya setuju dan saya  sokong, quoting what you  Prof said that history is base on emphirical records dan bukan cerita mulut ke mulut, maka tidak dinafikan Prof adalah  dari keturunan 5 freakies ini sb Prof pun takde emphirical record yang menafikan dakwaan saya.In other parts of the world, ther are several lost civilization and lost languages.Even the best cryptologist couldnt decode a lot of ancient writings & recording.Since no body knows  presicely which' 'keturunan melayu' Hang Tuah is, it is almost impossible track down and decode any records made by at that material time.

petikan dari internet:

There real-life existence of a forest-dwelling altruistic bandit definitely seems more plausible then a legendary king with a magical sword. However, the historical manhunt for the real-life Robin Hood has turned up entire scrolls of possibilities. Candidates include a fugitive in Yorkshire by the name of Robert Hod, who went by Hobbehod as well as a Robert Hood of Wakefield. The list of suspects was also complicated by the name "Robin Hood" eventually becoming synonymous with being an outlaw. His identity would later get murkier as the tales' authors wove more characters such as Prince John and Richard the Lionheart into the story.

Even the far advance Historians in UK couldnt definitely solve Robin Hood mystery , what else can you expect from an individual - a goverment  servant who fed his family from the earnings paid to him by the Goverment for doing nothing except trigggering the anger of the Malays.His KPI for 2011 is ZERO! Kalau tak boleh settle Isu Hang Tuah at least FAKTAKAN DENGAN TEPAT  Peristiwa Bukit Kepong. Saya bimbang nanti dia kata Pejuang Negara yang pertahankan kedaulatan agama & negara guna pistol air ketika bertempor dengan Kominis ( Perosak Negara). 

Dari perspektif Saikologi, semakin usia meningkat kita makin matang dan bijaksana malah lebih teliti dan cerewet.Pasti dalam ketelitian itu timbul personal requirements yang tidak rasional dan mengarut.

Pakar Sejarah Barat berkata 'History is written by the Winners", yes the 5 gangsters not only led the people of Malacca to defeat and  lost the state.He also ran away leaving his 4 friends to be mauled by the Portugese soldiers.

Hang Too Wah (as recorded in Hikayat Hang Tuah-theory on the final moments of Hang Tuah's life) that: he on witnessing the defeat and saw Malacca destroyed and  burnt to the ground following the Portugese assault, withdrew,  and took his steps to wade across a river holding his kris and dissappeared.

Teori kematian Hang Tuah yang kedua:Hang Too Wah didnt return to Malacca and believed to have dissappeared in Gunung Ledang area  after he fail to convinced the Princess of Gunung Ledang that the Sultan o Malacca wants to marry her.After the Princess turn down the proposal, Hang Tuah gave up  his Taming Sari to his friends and dissappeared!

Thus losers will never reveal or write anything regarding  defeat and failures.In my opinion Hang Too Wah ran away and deserted his troops (if any) ...  something a Islamic Malay warrior will never commit I repeat wil never commit as it is ' haram untuk melarikan diri dari peperangan'...balasan nya API NERAKA!

Akhirnya pejuang2 Melayu yang terdiri dari pelbagai keturunan akhirnya berjaya menghalau penjajah Portugis dengan penglibatan Belanda .Ketika itu tidak disebut  nama 5 Hang yang  jahil serta ketinggalan dengan kehebatan Tamadun China iaitu tamaddun bangsa nya sendiri.Pejuang Melayu dizaman Kesultanan Melaka telah memiliki Meriam dan Senapang yang gunakan gunpowder.This firepower made it very  difficult for the Portugese to conquer Malacca.It was recorded in the annals of history that the invasion was not a 'walkover' . Both sides had equal casualties and damage as hundreds of malay fighters using boats swarmed & attacked the Portugese Armada day and night. Again the Malay fighters proved their prowess when they , from many parts of the Peninsular assembled & aided by a small Dutch troops, eventually drove off the Portugese back to Goa India.

Hangin on the wall behind Thomas Edison is the portrait of my wife.She was 12 years old and the photo was use in her first identity card issued by the Registration Department.

And,and this foto taken June 2009 on the wedding dais ( pelamin )of  Azrul and Huda at our besan's (Hj.Rosli Hj Husin) home at Pengkalan Nangka Tumpat Kelantan.It was one of the happiest moment in our life as we a blessed with daughter (in-law).Hj Rosli's clan is among the respected people as his father - Hj Husin is the Imam of the Tumpat District Mosque.

                                                                                                                                                                     

Azrul & Huda at our home in Pengkalan Cepa, companied by all my brothers in laws & sisters  in laws. nieces & niece.

To organize a  large scale function succesfully, engaging the service of a  wedding planner is considered almost mandatory. It has to be and can't be avoided, to handle items from a to z coz .I was too busy ,engulf & drown  in the flames of official task, working in Penang as a head of department, aided by multi handicapped ministers to assist...who always fail in any given task.

I almost had a brain damage swallowing their antics which makes  my life so miserable as I had to squeeze my concentration & focus  to make  run office and at the same time to manage my family affairs  from afar.I always wanted a almost perfect or proper event for my only son, but my wish was destroyed by incapable so called deputies.

The lady wedding planner appoints a make up artist, a photographer, some workers to decorates the dais and the whole function, arranged the catering, waiters  & beautiful tents with scallops  and precise timings of the occasion to make sure everything is fantastic.

She reminded me to put full confidence in the Wedding Planner ability and she doesnt tolerate any interference.I agreed and in the end , she prove her professionalism & success  managing the whole affair which had over 1000 guest who came for the 'Menyambut Menantu' reception.

 

Disebut Jangan Dikenang Jangan Sebutir embun menitis Seribu kuntum mengembang Sepatah aku berjanji Kau sebut kau ulang-ulang Mencurah hujan membatu Meresap ditelan bumi Segala sumpah janji mu Tak satu yang kau tepati ( korus ) Tiada ku duga Tiada ungkitan Bagi mu tuan Ku rela dilupakan Ku diumpat jangan Dikenang jangan ( 1 ) Berlalu kisah di taman Bak mimpi diganggu siang Disebut diingat jangan Tak guna dikenang-kenang

Lirik lagu   diatas   nyanyian Rafeah Buang....Juara Bintang Radio Malaya tahun 70an.Lagu ini aku tujukan kepada kereta Galant GLS aku yang pergi tanpa pesan setelah dijual kepada seorang wakil kedai potong kereta di Segambut.Nak diungkit pun tak guna  , nak dikenang pun dah tak de.... kerana body kereta tu  telah dipotong2 dikerat2 , pintu, bonet & dan tutup booth telah dijual, malahan komponen lain seperti long shaft, half shaft,gear box dll, telah di'canibalised' untuk dijual secara item yang berasingan.Aku sayang sangat kereta pertama yang aku beli dengan bantuan arwah ayahandaku (Hj.Hassan Basri Md.Salleh)  pada tahun 1984 (second hand).Setelah kereta tu  dimamah usia dan bekalan alat ganti kian berkurangan dipasaran terang mahupun gelap serta performancenya yg 'degrading' tidak seperti baru, I'm left with only one choice that is to dispose the car.

Auto manufacturer sells dreams, lihatlah iklan Toyota Corolla Sprinter, how many seconds does it take to hit 100kph? Base on the spec, I  calculated 43 seconds ! The not so latest Ferari owned by Malaysians in the country  can hit 100kph in 5 seconds.But Ferarri do not require ads such as above but bullock carts do, in order to sell dreams.

                                                    

Carefree - Menyesal Tak Berguna

Melaluisebuah  rancangan permintaan lagu di Radio Melayu pada tahun 1979, ZB telah  'dedicated'kan lagu ini untuk aku.Nama aku dan nama ZB telah disiarkan keudara  oleh juruhebah pada tengah hari pada suatu hari ahad.Lagu  ini yang mempunyai maksud yang sangat bermakna, bagaimanapun aku menafikan apajua emosi atau 'soul' lagu ini dikaitkan dgn diri aku.I'm not related to any phrases in the song but I like listening becaz of its soothing melody and lyrics..There was no regret knowing her (very well)  and later chosing a different path which does't align with her wishes & dreams.Obviously all along the  the relationship was never stable and  it didnt materialize  due to continous objections and challenges.I uphold my faith that Allah is fair and blessed us in many ways especially for being able to meet up with her and later took painful steps  towards different directions.I wished her the best and since that day I move on taking long strides to rebuild my life within the tracks of Islam.

Married to Salwani Bt Hj Yusoff Ghouse in May 1984 in Kota Bharu Kelantan, her father was one of the prominent Class A Contractors , was very much involved in projects maintaining the East/West Highway.Later as the 1980ies economic downturn rules the industry, million dollar projects comes under the influence & monopoly of a political cartel, Hj Yusoff diversify in smaller scale construction and hardware retail business.Nevertheless we live in a happy contented family.

We had the chance to live in Malacca, Alor Setar , Penang and now residing in Kota Damansara. Along the way we matured and now we take live easy.No politics, non fanatics .... absolutely no rush, spend our free time at shopping malls and yearn for good food and restaurants.I still drive an old...bloody old Waja purchased in 2001 ,  constantly replacing every suspension parts & mountings .. rubber and polythurene plus the springs, shock absorbers,lower arms,using semi race clutch plates  and most important the 4 unit of the engine mountings which isolate the engine noise from the cabin.

Never tried  to imitate the rich or corporate  lifestyles by playing golf, walking around the country with a golf bag trailing ,flooded with the intention to impress and exhibit a false sense of prestige.

Hah! its not me, specifically when playing golf with the bosses , using the opportunity to prostrate and beg for promotion and friendship.One guy made a statement thet he will do anything for a promotion & a transfer to his hometown.Rendahnye lah akhlak dan harga diri insan insan yang kuat bermimpi ini.Lebih rendah dari harga sebutir  bola golf yang dipungut dalam kolam yang dihuni oleh biawak  dan dijual semula  'second hand' bagi tujuan latihan driving range..

The tightness and firmness of my Proton Waja suspension system is far off better that any brand new Proton product as I use Hi End replacement parts.

Added noise insulation paddings on the floorboard and engine compartment wall  made the silent equivalent to  a Merc or Benz.

                                                     

To enjoy song like 'Menyesal Tak Mengapa',The Waja is equipped with a high performance Sony EXPLODE head unit , an amplifier below the seat which is  connected to a 10 inch subwoofer located in the booth able to entertain every livingthings the sound of 60ies, 70ies and 80ies. If I am a music composer, I'll write a song called ' Tak Menyesal Pun.

For once I had the chance to be a head of department  for a  goverment agency at state level for  3 years in Penang representing the main organisation from Putrajaya which regulate the aviation industry of this country.The strength of the small  agency i lead  only  had 15 airtraffic controllers & 12 support staff, but it was powerful unit as it manages the aviation industry of the state and advises  administrative  elites of the state goverment on issues with regards to Civil Aviation Act 1968 and Civil Aviation Regulations 1996 & ICAO Annexes . And, another retarded child to be taken care of is the  airport operator (GLC) which doesnt have the right personel with the right knowledge to run the operations of an  airport effectively .


I enjoyed and at the same time suffered the reign but i felt so happy that it ended .Majlis  Mesyuarat Negeri is the state cabinet and I (in my official capacity) was called to give opinions to YBCM regarding issues that is related to Aviation.One frequent issue is the height controll of buildings and structure 15km radius of Penang Airport.Since the availability of condusive terrain or flat  land that is suitable to construct building or Condos,is seriously limited on the Island , development is pushed towards the south of the island where the airport is.But, by international requirement, there are limitations to the development around a runway for the reasons of safety, my organisation was blamed for distrupting physical development in the state.I had to explain in detailed with the calculations to make sure the runway meets international standards, otherwise international airlines will pull out if they were to  build a 20 story condo at the approach or takeoff path of the runway.Those are the time I use to rub shoulders with statesman at negeri or Persekutuan level.And to be among them I had to invest in the right clothings and had to do facial to enhance my appearance which is a vital factor !


At one point of my career, I was talked by 2 Dato' s to jump the boat to join the airport operator.I had friends Managers level and above whom indicated head hunting is on the way to import right professionals with the right cut from the Air Traffic  Management Sector to alleviate the staff shortage  problem . Airport managers must have complete knowledge whatz in the air.A hundred mile  volume of expertise and tactical air/ground operations and only Air Traffic Controllers have this.Regarding terminal building managers or airside managers, any experienced electrical engineer or civil engineer perform on that job..

The best thing I really felt first hand in Penang is : respect and friendship is so artificial...so unreal. Everybody around you nod their head , agree with you and keep on ugly smiles because of the power vested (temporarily) on you by the Law.Intially I got carried away with the party , dinner at 5 stars hotel .free treats at posh restaurants, sort of undivided attention  and ' friendships" of false obedience.But the very last day when I handed over the goverment owned handfon, and left only with my private handfon. Not a single ring came from the  human kind in the aviation industry in Penang .I hv no regrets as already knew this fact of live and I dont have any expectation from those I came across as the malay proverb says, jauh dimata hilang diingatan, despite knowing this before hand, I still felt dissappointed.

The only true friends is my wife, my son , my daughter Huda my family members and few of my ex staff & a few friends  who regularly calls and visit me at my home.

its almost a year now and nothing change...still no call and thats the reality I have to accept and thats the way it is..........artificial respect.

Any plans to visit Bayan Lepas ? for me its a big maybe  "NO" as close friends in my age bracket starts to fade into retirement and alot of heartbreaks happened especially in the office.As  a HOD, definitely I had certain expectation from the domestic Cabinet, but it was a weak, very weak  team to face the challenges of the operations.Lack of IT basic knowledge, inability to communicate in the prespective of 'KOMUNIKASI' with stakeholders and clients in a professional mood and unable to write  which and resulted that most of the time I had to  sit down in office or  at home writing and composing letters and paperwork.Becaz of maintaining this posture and pressure, in the end I had prolapse disc between L4 and L5!. Upon asking them regarding new issues , the standard answer is 'I've never done this before.....&     I dont know' is almost a standard answer.


As a administrator, I encourage them to attend short term courses at INTAN , but since the skull is made from titanium, any paradigm jump is out of reach.I recalled the term COMMUNICATION and the defination of TALK. The Cabinet is fond of TALKING but fail badly in COMMUNICATion The previous manager did suggested to a few individuals at the Org to learnup commuications but they laugh at the proposals.After I took over , I found up that the previous manager was precisely right that his subordinates lack Communication skills.


In 1985 I left my new born son Nor Azrul to attend 2 Aviation Specialization Courses in Aviation College Singapore, located in Seletar Air Base, and walk thru these gates daily to gain knowledge.My wife had to care for our child & attended by by parents.My dad passed away knowing that all his children had secure careers and will be able to go thru life without him.

Sacrifice.Thatz it. Students who went overseas had bigger sacrifices by themselves & their parents,some have to sell their only property , some had to carry out 2nd jobs and some mothers rears chicken and goats in order to cover their child education expenses. but there, the  few important individuals in the unit  bluntly refused to improve themselves when INTAN INTURA a goverment improvement centre  is a one hour drive fm their homes, where tuition fees & food being  borne by the employer.These people can and will  only talk loud and we let them talk loudest as they want when no body understand beimg the fact they do know how to  communicate. Now my daily task is just controlling air traffic which is fun and brief. Gone are the days of multi tasking and undefineable scope of work.


I appreciated the confidence Putrajaya had in me by appointing to head the state department and I appreciate much more being recalled back to the Air Traffic Controle Centre in Subang where I grew up.  pheew what a relief !                                                                 

One of the school blocks at Sekolah Kebangsaan Segambut looks like this (picture)  before it was demolished in the early 1970ies to give way to development.I clearly remember  school children  used  the steps up and down to the classes but during school holidays when human movement  was minimum, the goats from my kampung use to climb the steps  to rest at the windy verandah and the cows sleeps & rest themselves beneath the building hiding from the hot sun.

The building was like my second home as it was a stone throw distance from my house.I and my friends Rajimi, Mazlan and Yusoff spend most of our weekend, school holidays at the verendah of this school charring, playing cards and taking shot nap after lunch.There's nothing much to do at home as there was no tv or story books to read.The library is far in town and require some expenses if we decided to go.

Nowadays shool building s are designed differently to save space epecially in town areas.In fact a few schools had to share sporting facilities.Gone are the perimeter fencing and now brick walls surround the schools.But the generation changed, student those days goes to school to study and learn within the fencing.Now student prefer to stay outside the walls which surrounds the schools as life is more exciting than learning Physics.


However, there is one football field...a proper one.The younger boys at the kampung had to start to play football as early as 4.00pm coz by after 5 , the adults will occupy the field for training purposes or  inter village football match usually organised by the local youth club.... and we always there to watch til 7.00pm ..

                                                

the picture above is precisely what I went thru during my young days.Apart from the school field, certain open spaces are used and bw had to find 'buloh' which we pierce it into the ground and tie a long buloh across the two 'tiangs' to have a complete goalpost.

we continue to play rain or shine, never bothered of out future.I always tought that one day the furthest career that  I can go is working as general worker at one of the factories in Segambut.But things changed as I surprisingly got thru my LCE ,then MCE with strong results and eventually obtained Full Certificate for Higher School Certificate & scoring a Principle A for history..I wanted to take up Law but my Dad had exhausted his saving & earning to put my 2 elder sisters thru their studies at UM and ITM (those days).

                                                                           

By then I already knew my potential , inclination and my IQ level, and with a limited paper qualification I chose a short cut  to become a professional in the Goverment sector, I join the aviation industry which a crucial element to the country fundamentals.Similar to Doctors in the Health ministry, Air Traffic Controllers jumps the grade fast..very fazt, at the age of 31 , I join the Kumpulan Profesyenal & Pengurusan together with my colleage who join DCA together.While my classmates join the teachers training college and some went to Campus with Arts courses , eventually after more that 25 years of service, I am slightly ahead in terms of Grade( in the Public Sector).Syukur,everybody now  is almost equal in terms of income and social status.No of us became filthy rich, we are happy, comfortable and secured.

                                       

The tough life I went thru when I was a kid made me  a strategist.I always analyze based on famous warlords principles, then make my move silent and unnoticed to reach my objectivec as precisely  preached by the legend General Sun Tzu.

Nor Azrul , Huda & cucuku Nadmi.vacation photo taken just before the schooling session 2012 starts.The winter season at the outskirts of Ankara, Turki.This is their first overseas visit.Azrul and Huda went to Matriculations together then  USM Penang together & choose the same course Degree In Chemistry (minor Physics) with Education for four year....sponsered by Education Ministry and now employed by Education Ministry  and later got married.The wedding took place in Pengkalan Cepa (our home) and in Pengkalan Nanka Tumpat (Huda's home) in june 2009

11 months later, my grandson was born in USM hospital Kubang Kerian Kelantan.Nadmi showed that he is a strong active boy coz minutes after delivery, he's already kicking and looking around the labour room.I was the 3rd person he set eyes after his 'Ayoh' & Ibu.Waiting for his arrival, I was accompanied by Huda's mothers Cigku Asmah.She was very, very excited with this grandson of hers (also).


Huda was a straight 'A' scorer during her SPM and her brilliancy is featured in Nadms IQ.Azrul is a prolific physicist and mathematicians.However Allah is fair, when comes to analysis & logics it will be his game, but has limited talent and inclination towards literiture.Nevertheless Azrul , apart from teaching Chemisry & Physic at school, he gives individual  tuition on the same subject to selected student whose parents are from the elite level & filty richl.The hours are short and the money so good and frequently tuition is cancelled  as they leaves for overseas.Azrul now drives a Toyota Caldina & Huda drive around in a white Chery Eastar 2.0.

Aniz Zulaika bt Fadzil menyambut harijadi ke-12 di Cameron Highlands.Trip ini dianjurkan oleh ibunya Mazila Abdullah.Ayah Anis telah menempah beberapa bilik di sebuah hotel yang berprestij disana.Foto dirakam dilokasi popular iaitu berlatar belakang kebun teh.Selepas foto ini dirakam kesemuanya pi kena teh tarik untuk redakan kesejukan ...................with Sofea and  Fazura Mai..........................

the music played_ Matt Monro with lyrics

Semasa baru bekerja aku pernah juga beli kartrij player , tapi penampilan alat ini tidak lama kerana medianya iaitu kartrij bagi menyimpan data lagu berciri saiz besar dan 'clumsy'.Alat ini muncul selepas kaset dan hilang begitu saja dari pasaran.

Sebelum itu Arwah Abah aku telah membeli casetteplayer model ini pada tahun 1974 untuk kegunaan keluarga.Kaset pertama yg dibeli ialah Original Sound Track Filem Akhir Sebuah Impian.Abah aku yang sangat meminati musik turut beli kaset / gubahan terakhir PRamlee iaitu lagu Air Mata di Kuala Lumpur.

media bagi storage lagu dizaman 70an & 80an ialah kaset magnetik .Selain dari kaset yg siap dirakam oleh pengusaha cetak rompak, turut dijual kaset tanpa rakaman bagi kegunaan pembeli yang ingin merakamkan lagu terus dari siaran radio.

foto ini ialah radio kaset gelombang fm.Pada awal 1980an kaset cetak rompak berleluasa dijual dengan harga rm2.50 hingga rm3.00.Ia boleh didapati dipasar malam atau kakilima sepanjang jalan TAR, KL.Ketika itu aku crazy sangat dengan nyanyian Broery Marantika, apa saja kasetnya yang dipasarkan,terus aku beli, lagu nyanyian beliau dalam bahasa melayu,inggeris dan ambon, semuanya aku kumpulkan.

akhirnya hi fi idaman ku  berjaya ku miliki selepas beberapa tahun bekerja (the set whichI purchased exactly look like this).During the HiFi set era, Witney Housten and Julio Iglasias was the 'happening' in the world music industry.

In August 1979, I attended an interview at the Meeting Room General Manager Office DCA Subang Airport.Really hoping for a Goverment job after failing London Chamber of Commerce - Accounts exams .Still attending Form 6 Upper Arts 2 in Setapak High School in Air Panas and the  last few months of 1979 was so hectic and challenging as I  took preparatory steps and strategize my focus  to win over the HSC exams.                                                 

On the 1st February 1980 I reported duty and attended a few courses at Aviation College Subang,Mac 1980 I succesfully passed my HSC exams and was absorb to a higher scheme of service and remuneration, as I navigate my  way to become an  Air Traffic Controller.The most difficult hurdle was how to transform ownself from a teenager to an officer! Later, in the month of August 1981 I began my career and a brand new life episode in Kota Bharu Airport .

                                                       

Life was tough at the early stages in KB as I had to adjust to my work, enviroment, food and threats from the locals who branded me  an alien.However my colleages & housemates Nagaindran and Kandasamy-both from KL supported me in many ways.Equipped with their Honda Cubs, we manage our life remarkably well.

December 1981 we had to face the raging monsoon season which brought flood to the state. Goods sold at the sundry shop had to restricted to any individual  buyer and all 3 of us went to buy rice and sardines as the road to the main town was cut off.

I had a scary experience with Naga when we tried to go to Kota Bharu town during the continous heavy rain on a motorbike.We had no raincoat but used plastics to cover our body.The road at a place Baung was submerged and water was flowing across the road.We nearly fall & almost being swept away by the strong water current rushing towards a nearby river.Looking as the eyes could see, the road that takes to KB was totally  submerge we decided to return home.....

                                                

Good times never last and eventually one by one of us was transfered back to the west coast.One place that we all use to spend the evening eating keropok lekor was Pantai Sabak.Shown here is the remnants of the said beach as it eroded due to the constant fierce ferocious waves and wild winds of the South China Sea.

Later,in June 1983, with my employer endorsement, I managed to get a place in Singapore Civil Aviation College located in Seletar to study Airspace Management.The expenses was borne by Singapore Foreign Ministry and I had SD1100.00 a month for 9 months (apart from my normal 'gaji' from the goverment of Malaysia).The course was at a certificate level but that piece of certificate carried me very far and high in DCA.Nobody bothered what the accredition was, but holding a paper with your name on it and the prestigious Singapore Aviation College makes your market value jumps the steps.One thing I notice Singaporean Chinese, if I may note it down here, they are better in many ways than us.I saw they are commited to their work and aimed for excellence in no matter what job they do.If the readers in this blog doesnt agree, I have no problem, but I saw ,I learned the ethics and continue to practice nilai nilai murni penjawat awam SIngapura.Even the college driver who is a chinese is not like any Pemandu Jabatan Kerajaan.Majority of the DCA drivers talk more than the officers during the journey, becoz they thought the the officers 'menumpang' kenderaan Bapak mereka.Maybe they work as part time taxi drivers and continue the taxi driver culture into the Malaysia Civil Service.Infact nobody listen to their opinions coz during travelling , is the best chance to get ready for a presentation or meetings.

The finest example the mentality & fluidity of the Singapore Civil Service is when I collected my monthly allowance cheque  at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs .It was a total shock as they spelt my name wrongly and this will prevent me from cashing the cheque at DBS bank.I was stunned and my thought raced towards a negative side 'oh my , it will take months to correct this mistake'.I was right if the mistake happened in my country.But in Singapore, the officer who handed me the cheque earlier told me a take a seat and wait.I saw him rushing in and out of different rooms and after about 40 minutes, he handed me another cheque with the right spelling typed.Kalau dinegaraku,hmmmm definitely the dialoque wil be 'maaflah, encik balik dulu dan tunggu sehingga kami panggil , kite kena buat baucar tu semula dan hari ini Pembantu Akauntan pergi kursus,Penolong Akauntan pi meeting,  Akauntan baru saja pi mampuih...........................ha..ha..budaya orang kite.